Pretender

So this morning I realized something...I'm a pretender. I put on my happy face, use my happy voice, smile and pretend like I'm fine. And when people sincerely ask me how I'm doing I cant give them a sincere answer. I just tell them I'm fine and smile. I think I say I'm fine so much that I have begun to believe it. I'm not sure why I tell people I'm fine when I'm not, it doesn't really make sense hu? Yea, I didn't think so. I guess I just assume that people don't really want to know how I am they just ask me that to be polite. I make a lot of assumptions...I probably shouldn't do that so much. I guess I need to work on being more honest, I need to be real and stop pretending because pretending to be honest isn't doing me any good.