Can I be honest? Can I be completely and total honest? I dont want to show up at church and have people looking at me differently. I dont want to walk in to the living room and have my parents all concerned. Not that it really matters what i right on here because my parents are already concerned and people at church do look at me differently. That's just what happens when you cut yourself. But any ways back to being honest. To be honest I'm not happy. I'm not a happy kid, or adult, or teenager... I dont know whatever I am I'm not a happy one. And to be honest I'm tired of pretending to be. But what can I do? I kindu have to put on that smile dont I? I mean what would people think if I was walkin around sad all the time? The only time I can show how I'm feeling is behind closed doors. Be hind my locked door is the one place I dont have to wear a mask. I guess that is why I spend so much time in my room.